Now Simmering · Full-Time · Permanent

One bowl. Fully loaded. Served warm, all year round.

A long-term partner role has opened in the life of Ian Campbell. It's the kind of recipe you don't reheat — you commit to it. Slow-cooked, no shortcuts, no instant packets.

365days/yr on the stove
100%broth, no filler
0games played
Ian Campbell
Ian Campbell · Head Chef & Only Item on the Menu
Executive Summary

The pitch, in one ladle.

Objective

To find one person to share the pot with — someone who's tired of the situationship sampler platter and wants the real, home-cooked thing. I'm not looking to be somebody's snack. I'm looking to be somebody's whole meal.

Hi, I'm Ian. I'm 24, I'm 5'11", and I have been told my personality has notes of warmth, a little spice, and something you can't quite place but keep coming back for.

Who's cooking

I'm a giver by nature — happiest when I'm taking care of someone. I like being the one who keeps the pot warm and lets the right person call the shots. If you want a partner who's easygoing, a little submissive, and genuinely wants to make your life softer, I'm your bowl.

Long game: I want to be a stay-at-home dad. Apron on, kids fed, house smelling like something good on the stove. That's the whole dream, and I'm not shy about it.

Core Ingredients

What's actually in the broth.

Every good soup is just a few solid ingredients that don't quit on each other. Same energy here.

Emotional availability98%
Texts back like a functioning adult100%
Cooks (unironically)92%
Remembers the little things95%
Video games (competitive napping tier)96%
Pokémon — gotta season 'em all99%
Ability to parallel park71%
Knowing when the soup is done100%
Prior Experience

Simmered, not rushed.

Present

Senior Technical Director

Kennesaw State University (KSU)

The one on the résumé that's actually true. Senior enough to be trusted with the important stuff, technical enough to fix your Wi-Fi, and directorial enough to run a kitchen and a household with the same calm hand.

Ongoing

Head of Household Soup Operations

The Apartment

Maintains morale, keeps the pantry stocked, has never once let a roommate go hungry. Earned the name "SoupBoi" the honest way — the last name is Campbell. Yeah. Like the soup. Mm mm good, allegedly.

2002 – now

Being, generally, a catch

Planet Earth

24 years of field experience. Slow-cooked. References available upon request (they're my roommates and they will vouch, loudly).

The Ideal Applicant

Who I'm cooking for.

Not a huge list. I'm easy to please and hard to get rid of.

  • Warm. Kindness is the whole recipe. Everything else is seasoning.
  • Communicates. If something's off, we talk it out over a bowl of something. No cold shoulders — those ruin the broth.
  • Has their own flavor. Passions, opinions, a life. I want a partner, not a garnish.
  • Tall and brunette. I have a type and I'm at peace with it. Look down at me lovingly and we're already halfway there.
  • Bonus: will fight me (playfully) over the last dumpling. That's how I know it's love.
What's Inside · Benefits Package

Nutrition facts.

Nutrition Facts

Serving size1 whole guy (5'11")
Loyalty100%
Emotional intelligenceDaily Value 140%
Drama0 g
Green flagsExcellent source
Red flagsYes. All of them.
ContainsWarmth, spice, big serotonin
*Percent daily values based on a relationship of 2,000 shared meals a year.
🍲

Always fed

Emotionally and literally. You will never wonder what's for dinner again.

🛋️

Full comfort coverage

Bad day? There's a couch, a blanket, and a bowl of something with your name on it.

♾️

No expiration date

This isn't a limited-time menu item. Once you're in the pot, you're family.

Frequently Asked Questions

Before you order.

Is this serious or a joke?

Yes. The soup bit is a joke. The wanting-someone-to-share-a-life-with part is extremely not.

Why "SoupBoi"?

Last name Campbell. Like the soup. It was inevitable, it was earned, and it stuck. I've made peace with being a lifelong brand ambassador for a product I don't get paid by.

What are you actually looking for?

Something serious. I'm not on the sampler menu — I want the real, long-term, build-a-life-together thing. If you're just browsing, that's okay, but I'm here for the whole pot.

Do you really cook?

I do. Signature dish: Spam musubi — humble, a little unexpected, and secretly one of the best things you'll ever put in your mouth. Kind of like the whole package.

What if I don't even like soup?

We can work with that. Character growth is welcome. The soup is a metaphor anyway. Mostly.

Ready to Order

Get a bowl before it sells out.

One applicant gets the whole pot. No commitment issues here — the commitment is the entire point.

Yes, the email is literally idc@soupboi.us. I care deeply. The address just doesn't.